Got this from Female Network, my fave site.. :)
1. STOP THE VERBAL ABUSE NOW.
Do you put yourself down with negative thoughts about your body? Just as the constant abuse of a boyfriend or parent chips away at one’s self-esteem, so does your verbal self-flagellation. “What we give out in life, we get back. This includes he thoughts we have about our bodies,” says Sally Forrest, a partner at SoulCentre, an organization that holds self-transformation seminars.
She continues, “It’s important to think positive thoughts about your body, because whatever we focus on grows. When the mind has positive thoughts, the body produces chemicals called endorphins, which enhance your moods and energy level, keep you young and vibrant, and also help your cells regenerate.”
She shares this simple exercise: “When you wake up, look in the mirror and say, ‘I am happy, I am healthy, and I am beautiful just the way I am.” Keep saying it until you believe it, and you will experience the change.
2. BE YOUR OWN ROLE MODEL.
If your lack of self-confidence stems from not looking like any of the wispy celebrities or models in the glossies, change your visual scenery. Get rid of images that make you feel inadequate (check out these curvy celebrities who flaunt their curves instead, for example).
“Put up pictures of yourself that make you happy—whether it’s the way you look, what you’re doing, or who you’re with in the pictures,” advises Laura Berman, PhD, author of The Passion Prescription: Ten Weeks to Your Best Sex—Ever! Her suggestions: Choose artwork that celebrates various female shapes, and limit the time you spend watching TV shows or films populated by completely unrealistic women and men. “This is the perfect setting in which to begin rediscovering some body confidence.”
3. INVEST IN SENSUAL LINGERIE.
Don't just wear them when you're planning to have sex. Donning a soft lace bra and a matching pair of knickers under your everyday clothing will make you feel sexy at any time of the day. It’s really all about finding the right material and fit. If you must buy it in a size that doesn’t sound sexy, just do it (snip off the tag to feel better). Make sure your underwear gently hugs the curves of your body and makes you giggle with pleasure when you see how hot you look in the mirror.
4. HEAT THINGS UP.
If you can’t stand working out in the gym, burn calories while doing something that makes you feel sexy. Dance studios now offer belly dancing, exotic dancing, and even pole dancing classes—workouts that reshape your body and encourage you to let go of your inhibitions. Carla, who took a pole dancing class, says, “At first, I kept laughing at how silly I looked in the mirror. But after a few sessions, I got into the music and the moves! It was very liberating and made me more confident about my body."
5. STRIP DOWN TO YOUR BIRTHDAY SUIT.
When you get some alone time, walk around your home in the nude. It’s the easiest way to feel comfortable in your own skin. “As you pass mirrors, glance and appreciate the beauty of your body,” writes Hilda Hutcherson, M.D. in her bookPleasure: A Woman’s Guide to Getting the Sex You Want, Need, and Deserve. If you have a private backyard, get naked outside. Feel the sunshine against your skin, the wind tickle every part of you, and how good it all feels.
6. FIND A GENIE IN A BOTTLE.
Sometimes, a little beauty product can work its magic to make you feel more confident pronto. A silky body oil applied on skin can make shoulders and legs look sleek and sexy.Self-tanning lotion can lessen the appearance of cellulite and give the illusion of looking slimmer. The right scent sprayed on your pulse points can make you walk with a spring in your step.
7. STRAIGHTEN UP.
When you hunch your shoulders, your gut sticks out, your breasts disappear, and you look shorter than you are. On the other hand, proper posture encourages you to pull back your shoulders, suck in your gut, and walk tall. You instantly look better, slimmer, and happier. Want to get into the habit of standing tall? Yoga and Pilates can work wonders.
8. THINK LIKE A MAN.
Men are not as critical as we women are about our own bodies. Men who are dedicated to their partners love them for who they are—including their imperfections and wobbly bits! What’s important is that you’re confident about your body. A spunky attitude and healthy self-esteem are two things that are appealing and sexy to men.
9. ACCENTUATE THE POSITIVE.
Take an inventory of your best assets: Do you love your bow-shaped lips? Your head of naturally curly hair? The rich caramel color of your skin? Show it off! Emphasize your clavicle with a stunning pendant. Dust body shimmer onto your shoulders, then slip on a halter top. Dare to wear a shorter skirt to call attention to your toned calf muscles. When you hone in on your most pleasing traits, you shift the focus away from what you don’t like to attractive qualities you feel more confident about.
10. TAKE PLEASURE IN YOUR SENSES.
Believe you are entitled to deriving joy and pleasure from your body right now—not once you’ve shed 20 pounds. Whether it’s the smell of freshly brewed coffee, the trill of birds chirping, or the soft sensation of pure Egyptian cotton on your skin, make a habit of stimulating these senses every day.
When you pamper your body with lots of TLC daily, you send a message to yourself that you are worth all the fuss and attention just the way you are. This growing confidence will reward you with courage to allow yourself more “perks,” including truly satisfying sex. “Learning to love and accept your body will make it easier for you to abandon yourself to sex, alone or with a partner,” says Dr. Hutcherson.